What’s love got to do with employee engagement?

So, here’s a fun twist. My personal goal for the year is to become a better listener. Not the usual “sign up for the gym and go every day” kind of resolution that lasts all of two weeks. Nope. I got smarter and picked something meaningful and realistic.

Which brings us here: me, talking about love. I know, it sounds a little odd at first - love and HR? But stay with me. The title of this article isn't just for laughs. “What’s love got to do with it?” Actually... a lot.

Let me paint a picture we all know too well.

A leader comes to you and says, “We need someone amazing. They’ve got to be creative, strategic, engaged, and ready to take the company to the next level. Oh, and they need to know these 17 things and have unicorn-level instincts.”

And you, dear HR partner, think, Great. Another mythical creature search.

But you roll up your sleeves. You talk to recruiting. You research. You dig. You find her. She’s real. You bring her in and onboard her like a rock star. Everything is smooth. She’s excited, you’re excited. She starts to perform, and everything is going great.

Then, 18 months later... she’s gone.

Sound familiar?

This is where love comes in, because work relationships? They follow the same emotional arc as personal ones. And if we look at them through that same lens, maybe we can stop being surprised when things fall apart and instead, start building relationships that last (or at least last long enough to matter).

Let’s think about your “first love”

Take 20 seconds and think of someone you’ve had a meaningful relationship with. Romantic or not, but someone who gave you butterflies or made a big impact in your life. Got them in your mind?

Here’s the connection: in both personal and professional relationships, we’re all chasing the same three things:

Trust. Respect. Growth.

That’s it. That’s what keeps people in love - and keeps employees engaged.

The honeymoon phase

You’ve heard it at work. “She’s still in the honeymoon phase.” Everything is new. They’re wide-eyed. Rose-colored glasses on. Judgment turned off. Research even shows the judgment centers in our brains literally go quiet during this phase.

It’s just like that moment you meet someone, and everything they do is amazing. "He chews so loudly—it’s adorable!" Then six months later, you’re like, "He chews like a wildebeest."

At work, we need to embrace the excitement of this phase but also set clear, honest expectations. Show people the good, the bad, and the real. Because if we let them believe the fairy tale, reality’s going to feel like betrayal later on.

Then comes the crisis

This is when things get hard. People start to wonder, “Did I make the right decision?” “Is this really the place for me?”

From an HR perspective, this is where we often swoop in with stay interviews or even counteroffers. But let’s be honest, it’s often too late. The doubt is already rooted.

The key is to intervene before it becomes a crisis. We need to talk early about challenges. We need to co-create goals. Remind people why they joined. Connect their personal ambitions to the organization’s mission.

And if we do it well, we set the stage for a deeper connection.

Door #1, door #2... or door #3?

Once we hit that difficult stage, there are usually three paths:

Door #1: Stay in crisis mode. These are the folks who are checked out but still here. Honestly, this is the worst outcome.
Door #2: Leave. Restart the cycle somewhere else.
Door #3: Work through it and build a deeper connection.

I met a man recently who’d been with his company for 19 years. He said, “We reset.” They worked through tough stages and recommitted again and again.

So yes, long-term commitment is possible. But like any good relationship, it takes ongoing work.

Not everyone is looking for 'forever'

Here’s the twist. Not everyone’s looking for “forever.” Not in life, and certainly not at work.

I had three long-term boyfriends. I married the third. Eighteen years later, still going strong. But not everyone wants that, and that’s OK.

The same goes for employees.

The tapestry of relationships (personal and professional) has changed. Many people want independence, flexibility, project-based work. And it’s not because they can’t get a full-time job. It’s because they don’t want one.

According to MBO Partners, over 72 million Americans are working independently - part-time, full-time, or occasionally. And more than half of them do it by choice. Only 10% are forced into it by circumstances. The rest? A mix. But this movement is real.

Why people choose independent work

Authenticity: 61% say they can be more themselves.
Freedom: They choose who they work with and what they work on.
Clarity: They know the end date. That alone brings peace of mind.
Optimism: 73% are hopeful about their future.
Satisfaction: 84% of full-time independents report being happy in their work.

So here’s the question: Are we ready to meet this moment?

Because we’re not just competing with each other for talent, we’re competing with freedom.

Real talk: How do we adapt?

A few big ideas:

Flexible work models: Embrace project-based roles. Offer short-term gigs. Don’t insist on 40 hours a week if you don’t need it.
Shorter, smarter onboarding: For independents, it’s about quick integration and compliance. For full-timers, it’s also about culture and long-term alignment.
Custom compensation and benefits: Dream with me - a “comp salad bar.” Don’t want our health insurance? Trade it for retirement contributions. Want more cash? Skip the gym subsidy. Let’s build benefits people actually value.
Growth for all: Every worker (contractor or employee) wants to grow. Are we providing that? Are independents part of our learning and development plans? They should be.
Inclusive culture: Do we invite contractors to the company town hall? Celebrate their wins? Include them in our Slack channels? That sense of belonging makes a massive difference.

At Nimbus, we worked with an incredible designer based in Italy. She built one of the best decks I’ve seen, and we would’ve never hired her full-time. But through project-based work, we tapped into excellence.

This is the future of work. And honestly, it’s already here.

So what’s love got to do with it?

Everything.

Whether we’re talking about employees or contractors, full-timers or freelancers, relationships are the foundation of engagement. And just like in love, there’s no one-size-fits-all.

Some people want to commit. Some want to keep it casual. Our job is to listen, adapt, and co-create something that works for both sides.

And just like any relationship, the quality depends on communication, honesty, trust, and mutual growth.

So as we rethink employee engagement, maybe the question isn’t What’s love got to do with it? Maybe it’s this:

Are we willing to love people the way they need to be loved at work?

That means meeting them where they are, embracing nontraditional paths, and building organizations flexible enough to support the evolving definition of work.

Let’s lead that change.

Let’s keep the conversation going

Our events are designed for people leaders who want to think differently, ask the tough questions, and connect with others navigating the same changes in the world of work.

We talk about the real stuff - engagement, trust, flexibility, and yes… sometimes even love.

Check out our upcoming events and come join the conversation. We’d love to see you there!

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What’s love got to do with employee engagement? (Spoiler: everything)